superficiality

i was reflecting last week.  i seem to act with urgency, drama and excitement on just simple eventualities of my life!  eventualities of not so real stuff compared to shaking problems of a typical human being.  i act as if it was a world of problems when real people’s problems is a kaleidoscope of sorts!  real problems of family life, finances, relationships, mindsets, failures, challenges and even dreams that are far beyond my ka-OAhan complications!

i felt that i am so loved by the lord.  wala man ko sang real problems gid of that magnitude.  i only have conceptual problems that i create, maybe to excite me and maybe to solve most-likely problems of the future (imagine sa future pa)!hahaha in short, binuang lang!hahaha here are some:

i felt na i can’t decide to commit on marriage now because i don’t want to have a family life like most people.  sa survey, 84% of families has either or both parents having extra marital affairs (and i bet its far higher that stat since damo man hindi manugid or madakpan).  ofcourse it is a kaleidoscope of reasons.  things from a nagging wife, a less earning breadwinner, a poor connect on the level of conversations, a “libog” of sorts to physical attractiveness, an obsession for material things and a lot of other stuff.

things that i slowly and tried to continually solve now to have none of these issues affect any of my kids when they grow up.  to have a perfect childhood!  solutions that are too simple and weird to do.  i know na hindi na ko madala subong sang physically attractive chic since i’ve realized years before that beauty and sexiness is just superficial.  things i learned from dating beautiful women.  after mag-edad ano?hehehe ofcourse, kasimple sang sabat.  you shouldn’t sell your whole life with a superficial beautiful gal since in your 40s it is just a 10,000 peso experience to have a 20 year old super gorgeous and clean chic!  just joking with common logic!  i have created conceptual problems of these sorts earlier in life pero i try to not go overboard to make it a future learning and not a present problem..hehehe

if kami ni crystal, i know na hindi issue ang meeting a much more intelligent chic to share ideas and life with since honestly when we were a couple i never met someone more intellectually exciting than her!  hindi man issue ang wealth potentials (i guess these type of issues drives most family problems) since we both acknowledge that wealth is just a state of mind.  people don’t have financial flexibilty because their minds are closed.  so in a physical, intellectual and wealth potential sense i know that these issues are already solved by creating conceptual (but not so real) problems that may have hurt both of us in some way.  but to not bring a tear to our future kids!

my fear is what if i’d like someone for “no reason”?  someone inferior in a finger-counting sense but defies reason.  someone i can’t label as just beautiful, just intelligent and just wealthy to kill off interest.  someone i just like without thinking!  i know the answer to these as i knew the answer to being drawn physically to people years before, but these can be only solved by being in the situation and not as a 3rd-party reader of self-help books!  i know that feelings are “fickle”.  daw “tigbaw nga ginadapya sang amihan”.  pero i won’t know until i cross the bridge.  what if love is really risking (not placing into consideration being a part of the 84%) just to be personally elated at that instant?  pero daw sala, daw ka selfish.hehehe pero hindi ko kabalo.

i guess it is still best to solve these issues before marriage (i guess it is the primary purpose of having a pre-marriage relationship).  in a philippine societal setting, i guess women rush to marriage when they have physical contact with the one they have present relationships.  it is not that they are ready for the long-haul but its because of a security need.  so i guess its part of the reason why it is a high 84%++ ( i would even bet that its 95% if gasugid lang tanan maayo..hehehe daw laka gd man families ko na kilala na la prob..hehehe).  ginapilit ta lang neglect ang reality because we are cataracted with the feeling of love.  if you noticed, puro lang “ako” dire ang may issue.hehehe  i trust crystal morethan i trust myself.  she is the only person i know who is a well made and a strong person that is less affected by these ka-OAhan stuff..hehe  maybe because of being truly near to the lord.

pero again, nahuya ko sang gnapang-sulat ko.  it is not even comparable to real problems of people.  it’s a future issue i’m trying to solve now.  and it looks superficial.  and i may look like a paranoid.  pero it’s also the same superficial way i handle my businesses that’s why i haven’t failed so far.  again, i wish that my choice is right!hehehe

the agony of the beautiful

another play of words.

according to www.wikipedia.com:

A paradox is an apparently true statement or group of statements that leads to a contradiction or a situation which defies intuition. Typically, either the statements in question do not really imply the contradiction, the puzzling result is not really a contradiction, or the premises themselves are not all really true or cannot all be true together. The word paradox is often used interchangeably and wrongly with contradiction; but whereas a contradiction asserts its own opposite, many paradoxes do allow for resolution of some kind.

 

again im playing with contradicting ideas grouped inside a phrase.  is there an inherent agony for beautiful things?  perhaps our hedonisitic society pushes us to believe that to be physically beautiful is of prime importance.  proof to this is the emergence of plastic surgery, the flourishing of beauty products businesses, even the wild imagination of people to link old beliefs of beauty enhancements with new technology, the all-day news reports of sexy cover girls in the magazine (that wows our senses) and seeing the pop culture hedonism in party places.  all of these pushes us to believe that it is one of the high levels of being accepted in the society to release the agony of non acceptance.

 

while talking to some people here and there, from the streets; internet or from just anyone.  i noticed that beautiful women live such a pityful and agonous life. 

 

1.  according to an attractive forum friend, she says that all of the men who tries to befriend her (except the married people) are courting her!  except me ofcourse..hehe its like, “can’t i be liked if im not pretty?” or “people don’t really like to be real friends with me but just get in my pants”.

 

2.  according to a married man who plays with girls, “i play with attractive women because they have skycraper pride!”.  “so is it supposed to be good or favorable?”, i asked.  he said, “ofcourse it is!  if you leave them they will have high pride to think that many men will still go after them and no risk with your wife then!”

 

3.  according to a young chickboy bachelor, “if you see a pretty girl, dont be scared.  they are easier to play with!”.  again i asked why.  because they know it!  they are well acquainted with the idea that people just go to them to try to get in their pants!  so as not to make any thing you do sound as bizarre!  they inherently know that they are for display and its their value in life.  so again don’t be startled when you see these types passed on by friends acting like they dont know of such a frame-up!  they do.  and they accept that role in the society.

 

even if its quite different, when i see a super gorgeous; tall; hot chick; wavy-haired and formy gal i see in the mall now..  i pity the situation that society pushed them to have.

 

its hot but its not!

proverbs 15:22

i was touched by this passage: “plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed”the “consultative council” thing that i have been practicing for years was amazing to see in a bible’s passage. its included in bro. pio español’s talk on the kerygma feast last feb 7. the talk was about “the key to winning every race”. perhaps it is true. this has been my secret for not loosing a dime in business. i talk to a lot of people on critical decisions without hesistancy. most of them thinks that i’m better to decide on my own and that their opinion is of less value (since most are not entrepreneurs). if only they knew, that i really draw ideas from them and mix it.  even if i don’t follow all of their ideas perfectly, its helpful..hehehe

i talk to people coming from the streets, from people where i strucked a 2 hour conversation out of nowhere (most of the times not remebering their names), to people from the academe, to corporate folks, to government people, to inventors, to artists, to pedicab drivers, to experienced entrepreneurs, to old people (which i like talking because of timely wisdom), to kidnappers even, to our parish priest, to some crushes here and there and to my key people. this process offers a diverse view of things on differents social, political and just plain life setting! this diverse view of things taken piece-wise will be anything but utterly useless. but if mixed together with an open mind you would consider things that were not done before.

something quite magical. something excitingly genius. some idea that’s as pure and complicated as love..hehehe perhaps when people ask, where did you get all these new business concepts? im answering “we developed it”. ofcourse its the only thing we did, build on and develop to what would have been useless singular ideas. i guess most of the heralded genius concepts are found on the streets and the bible. its not mostly from white-collar corporate desks..hehehe and i guess even my most wildly-creative marketing concepts are influenced by the bible..its seeing outside the box of normalism!whahahaha what a word..

let me give an example, a pedicab driver whom i talked wants water to be priced low for him to afford it for his family (market demand), an entrepreneur friend says that its impossible for a lot of costs are involved (cost acctg), an electronics enthusiast was excited about automating magnetic valves but is blank on how to use it (the cost controller), an established eccentric inventor friend can draw up the plan for the challenge’s sake but do not know how to sell (technical design), an automation engineer friend who don’t have a break to be popular wants to use a PLC-SMS controller (R&D), another one has capital but only knows typical busnesses bound to lose (financial)..hehehe what i did is just add a little of improvements in the engineering design, management of product development and aesthetics and drawing up a marketing plan and voila! its something..waaaaaaaaaaah!hehehe

ok. so enough for that..where is the moral of the story? in our present day society which pushes us to specialize with higher education it kind of veers away from “knowledge enlargement” needed in business and life in general. we are made to be good “technicians”, specialist in a sense (even on office work) for us not to own our time to develop a compendium of ideas..or simply not to have the time to have coffee and pasta with these diverse friends at our time..hehehe because of the above paragraph, we tend to be proud and not even consider talking to a lowly takatak boy. because “what would we get from them?” our specialist mind thinks..hehe “im more intelligent than a takatak boy so as for him to not deserve even a minute of my time”.

to cut the story short, to have success in life is to humbly ask for advices from a mix of people contrary to what our white-collar success pushes us not to believe. its to listen and ask. plain and simple.hehehe and not complain and wish for something in the sky!